Thursday, April 23, 2009

Principles of Parenting

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Have you ever noticed how often your children need reminding of things that you have taught them and are teaching them? God recognized this need for reminders when he gave the nation of Israel Deuteronomy 6:4-9. This passage became sort of the life-mission-statement for the people of Israel: “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.”


The need for reminders does not just apply to kids. I find myself constantly needing to be reminded of parenting skills that I learned and then later found myself slipping on. That being the case, here is a summary list of the key parenting principles that we have been talking about since Passionate Legacy began back in December of 2007. After each principle are links to the articles which address that topic.


1. Be a desirable example of godliness so that your children will choose it for themselves. Children grow up to be adults with a free will. They will choose a way of life based on what seems desirable, true, available, and satisfying. (Matt. 5:15-16, Titus 2:6-8, 1 Peter 3:1-2)

Convincing or Living?

A Leader Worth Following

We have seen the enemy …


2. Accept your right and responsibility to train your children. (Prov. 22:6, Deut. 6:4-7, Eph. 6:4b, Titus 2:15)

Who has the authority in your house?


3. Aim at the heart. The goal of parenting is to instill a desire and ability to love God and obey him. Our primary goal is to motivate our children to obey God out of love for God and a love for what is right. Our secondary job is to equip them with the tools to be able to accomplish this with success.

The Essential Nature of Self-Control

Fear of Punishment or Love for what is right?

Aim for the Heart


4. Make the rules of the house clear and consistent. (Eph. 6:4, Col. 3:21)

Clear and Consistent


5. Expect obedience. Always ensure that your word is obeyed.

Expect First Time Obedience

First Time Obedience Part II


6. Have a plan for discipline. Learn what consequences should be applied to which misbehaviors so that when the situation arises you are prepared to act decisively.

Have a Plan for Discipline Part 1 Handling Disobedience

Handling Attention-Getting Behavior

Handling Habitual Breaking of Rules and Routines

Handling Aggressive Behavior and Deliberately Hurting Others

Conflict Resolution Skills for Kids


7. Understand the phases of childhood and select discipline that is appropriate to each.

Phases of Parenting


8. Deliver consequences and discipline in a godly, empathetic way.

Taking the Anger out of Discipline Fighting the Battle!

See Discipline as Teaching

Is Your Discipline Getting Derailed?

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